schools not as bad as it seeems.

this sem, im learning a whole lot of shit subjects that would be really useful in the industry.
and just as well, i wanted to learn stuff like php and xml for my own use.

on the other hand, im beginning to give up on a social life in school and am determined to slog my guts out to deperately pull my gpa score up to a level that would please the gods.

give up on my social life?
i guess its a yes, as least within the walls of my school. BECAUSE, apart from my original CG, everyone else walks around with black faces and AND give their trademakr fake smiles and greetings.

waittt...... even i myself am a pro at those fake emotions, fight poison with poison.

cheerios!

and then suddenly, he took me with his big and strong hands and snapped me into 2 pieces.

its been too long since the last time i didnt get what i thought i was ready to have.
BAM!


ive been sitting my ass at home for too long this 1 1/2 months. and then tomorrow, im going back to school, the so called reality life of my 18 year old self.

is it just me thinking thats its hard to fit in with the rest of the students in school, or AM I IN THE WRONG faculty?

because i know i belong someplace better.
------------------------------------
i shall continue with an update tomorrow.
unless i turn into a twit within the next 24hrs.
oh lessons and lectures, COME get a piece of me!

"each wave of pain comes every half hour" "how're u feeling?"

-some dialogue from the movie world trade centre

i feel horrible.
besides the fact that i'll be meeting up with some sch mates in the coming 2 days.

kiss me baby, fuck reality.

pardon the language.

im turning 18 Tommorow!

to do list: (in order of importance)
1. sign up for driving licence
2. learn to hold my tongue
3. appreciate what i have =D
4. plan my room's renovation

5. work hard next sem

GOD has been kind. and im learning to see him working in my life.

i am not perfect, still thinking and doing ungodly things.....

-------------------------
now now, just this week i feel broke again.

new hats, pay school fees, pay transport fees,planning to spend on someonesomeone.

and then! i start to recieve my birthday ang-baos etc etc etc.... hurrr

though im not in the best of moods, and likemy friend said:

something like.. dont fall down how to show u my power.

jeremy told me that it was still ok to join them for choir practices, my god! u guys have no idea how much i would miss going for practice...

and then not too long ago earlier this week i felt like pms mood i dunno why also and then i treated everyone and everything like shit.

and then i think i am selfish, in a way like... oh man my big day is ard the corner and im so unhappy.

ohwell it seems that things are starting to turn around now... and i think the weekend will be even greater.

-----------------

dunno what im saying also lah. nows like 4am.

kk thanks for reading, this is like self dialogue.